Children, besides having their own identity, are most often reflecting their parents actions, words, thoughts etc. and this is not something that we are not aware of.Yes, we consciously try to be at our best when they are around, but the times when we slip can be quite alarming. How non- chalantly we pass on our dislikes and our fears and honestly, we are rather oblivious about it at that point in time. Of course, in hindsight, the rationale is all there..
Now, I particularly don’t like reptiles as a species..so the other day, when Ms. Lizzy, a house lizard decided to show up, my spat of words ranged from yuck, creepy, and even more choicest adjectives just spew out! The emotions just poured freely and my face said it all. At another time, a dislike for a particular food presentation came out rather strongly. It is my way of looking at these things , but now my kids have started parroting my words whenever they see one of those harmless beings or that food served somewhere ! Completely not called for! Yet again, a learning for me to not pass on my biases to the kids. The strong emotions which we all carry have to really not show their faces to the fresh minds. It does require a good bit of mind control at the right time and the right place ; difficult, but totally worth it! Very recently, I had to witness an unpleasant experience concerning my child ( a pet dog gave a serious dig into her pink lips, a feature quite becoming of a young lady!) but somewhere my mettle took over and it really helped in controlling the trauma for my little one! GOOD ME!! Am now secretly wishing the scar to fade away and gradually in time go away completely.
Consciously trying to control my angsts and my prejudices for things. Don’t want the kids to grow up disliking certain foods, places, spaces, experiences because of me. Will be happy to see them use all their sensory organs and make their own sound judgements.
GrowingupMatters 